OK, so here's the back story to this conversation....Kohl has asthma and he struggles when it comes to running, especially up in Snowflake. So last year we did the Pioneer Day run....I was wanting to run, but Kohl my little wheezy man couldn't....he ended up hanging out with one of his aunts and walking the race while I ran it.... SOOO this year he did the run again and this is our phone conversation about it:

Kohl: Mom I did the run this year! And I think the medicine (inhailer)is really helping me.

Me: I know, Aunt Odie told me you ran the whole thing, all two miles.

Kohl: Did she tell you I threw up afterwards?

Me: Yes she told me that also.

Kohl: Yea it was gross, but mom remember how last year I came in 116th place.

Me: Yes Kohl I remember...and yes throwup is gross.

Kohl: Well guess what I got this year.

Me: Trying to be positive and optomistic, while also realistic and not wanting to guess 1st if he got 2nd or 3rd which could possibly make him sad (I overthink the majority of things).....I don't know son, 5th?

Kohl: No, I got 73rd!!! And my son, bless his little heart, was just as excited about 73rd as he would have been with 1st.

I love him....and am so very proud of him whether he's 73rd place or 1st, he's a champ.

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable; impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least the risk of tragedy is damnation. The only place outside of Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers of and perturbations of love is Hell. We shall draw nearer to God, not by trying to avoid the sufferings inherent in all loves, but by accepting them and offering them to Him; throwing away all defensive armour. If our hearts need to be broken, and if He chooses this as this the way in which they should break so be it." C.S. Lewis

My Bishop shared this quote with me a couple of weeks ago, and it has become one of my favorites...just wanted to share it.

the heart can break, it can be crushed, shattered and stomped on....but it can heal.

i know.

because mine has.

but i am a happy girl again.

don't get me wrong... i am still me

i still cry, still get frustrated and get impatient waiting for mr. right...but i'm happy.

i hike again,

and i go camping.

i took a spontaneous trip to california just because i had a smoothie that reminded me of the beach.

in less than 3 weeks i will be in havasupai with my best friends,

i have 2 beautiful children, who i miss very much at the moment.

i have the best and most crazy family a girl could ask for.

i played in the rain today...it reminded me of when i was little.

and most importantly i have a Heavenly Father who loves me...he's pretty awesome...and i love him too.

life is good.

Look at that face.......

How can you not smile while looking at this......